Tuesday, September 30, 2008

The Toilet Is Your Throne, The Bathroom Is Your Kingdom. Ladies In Girlie Mags Are For The Taking. Soft Bed And Pillows Await Your Pleasure Outside


















































































































Below is the image in its original context as derived from the page
http://www.usmagazine.com/celeb-divorces?slideshow_id=686&o=9

























Below is the image in its original context as derived from the page:
http://www.usmagazine.com/celeb-divorces?slideshow_id=686&o=7



























Below is the image in the original context as derived from the page:
http://www.usmagazine.com/celeb-divorces?slideshow_id=686&o=4
























Knock. Knock. There is a rapping on the toilet door.

WIFE: “honey, what’s taking you too long? you’ve been inside for over an hour.”

HUSBAND: “I’m reading the morning paper, hon.”

WIFE: “but hon, I have the morning paper right here.”

HUSBAND: “eeerrr, I’m catching up on yesterday’s paper, hon”

WIFE: “didn’t I use those to pick up Rinty’s leavings at the park?”

HUSBAND: “ehem, what’s with the big inquisition, darl, can’t a guy shit in peace anymore?”

WIFE: “you are jerking off again, you asshole, why don’t you bring that out here where it can be useful.”

HUSBAND: “no good, you don’t look like Jessica Simpson anymore, hon”

WIFE: “well, you don’t look like some Brad Pitt either, you jerk”

HUSBAND: “at least, I don’t wanna fuck me, he he”

WIFE: “what do you call what you are doing in there,asshole, isn’t that fucking yourself?”

HUSBAND: “no way, I’m holding up Maxim with Jessica on the cover.”

WIFE: “okay, suit yourself. I’m driving over to Montgomery Road in my undies and pick me up a nice black hunk piece of ass.”

HUSBAND: “wait, stop, once you taste black you are never coming back.”

WIFE: “not true too, how come Nicole Kidman bounced right back after Lenny Kravitz?”

HUSBAND: “that doesn’t count, he’s got a German name.”

WIFE: “so what gives about Germans?”

HUSBAND: “krauts got small peckers.”

WIFE: “where in the world did you get that?’

HUSBAND: “why do you think they eat sausages so much?”

WIFE: “why?”

HUSBAND: “they think eating phallic symbols will make their teeny links grow to big wieners.”

WIFE: “so you really don’t want to see me go, hon?”

Toilet door opens and sweaty husband steps out.

HUSBAND: “yeah, yeah, but clean up the toilet first, it’s muggy in there.”




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